drollery at its oddest


where have all the merrymakers gone?
September 12, 2006, 12:01 pm
Filed under: opinions, ramblings

personality tests are kind of silly though, aren’t they? honestly, if anyone is to be so oblivious that they really need to take a test to see what kind of person they are.. well, yeah, there should just be this stock answer for everyone: “you are not introspective. you constantly disregard your environment. you have never considered your actions or decisions in retrospect.”

maybe not. maybe i’m just bored. i’ll admit it. i am extremely bored. it’s 6:30 in the morning and i am supposed to still be studying for a couple of tests, but well, i don’t like math. so, anyway, i took a three question quiz. only three questions? i expected an answer similar to the one above, but what i got was surprisingly accurate.

Your Personality Is
Rational (NT)You are both logical and creative. You are full of ideas.
You are so rational that you analyze everything. This drives people a little crazy!

Intelligence is important to you. You always like to be around smart people.
In fact, you’re often a little short with people who don’t impress you mentally.

You seem distant to some – but it’s usually because you’re deep in thought.
Those who understand you best are fellow Rationals.

In love, you tend to approach things with logic. You seek a compatible mate – who is also very intelligent.

At work, you tend to gravitate toward idea building careers – like programming, medicine, or academia.

With others, you are very honest and direct. People often can’t take your criticism well.

As far as your looks go, you’re coasting on what you were born with. You think fashion is silly.

On weekends, you spend most of your time thinking, experimenting with new ideas, or learning new things.

The Three Question Personality Test

yes. i am a hypocrite. the scum of the earth. i have to admit though, while i’m confessing my stupidest moments, i did take a jung personality test once. it led to nothing short of amazement. not because i experienced some new revelation, but simply because it told me odd things that had nothing to do with the questions asked, and yet they were true. for example, “you like the rain.” there were no weather-related questions on the quiz. nothing close. are we all so similar? is it possible that there are other people just like me?

that is sad. not because i’ve always thought myself unique and special; i know i’m not. but, sad in that i feel sorry for that 4.4% of the population who is that similar to me. actually, this does kind of make it sound a little depressing to be me:

creative, smart, idealist, loner, attracted to sad things, disorganized, avoidant, can be overwhelmed by unpleasant feelings, prone to quitting, prone to feelings of loneliness, ambivalent of the rules, solitary, daydreams about people to maintain a sense of closeness, focus on fantasies, acts without planning, low self confidence, emotionally moody, can feel defective, prone to lateness, likes esoteric things, wounded at the core, feels shame, frequently losing things, prone to sadness, prone to dreaming about a rescuer, disorderly, observer, easily distracted, does not like crowds, can act without thinking, private, can feel uncomfortable around others, familiar with the darkside, hermit, more likely to support marijuana legalization, can sabotage self, likes the rain, sometimes can’t control fearful thoughts, prone to crying, prone to regret, attracted to the counter culture, can be submissive, prone to feeling discouraged, frequently second guesses self, not punctual, not always prepared, can feel victimized, prone to confusion, prone to irresponsibility, can be pessimistic

i did do a little research into the whole infp personality though and have since found much better descriptions that made me proud. i suppose i like my personality. i made a couple of friends take the jung personality test. their personality descriptions were just as accurate as mine. so, therefore, despite the way i began this post, i do accept this test. not that it really matters. should they really advertise the test: “april’s stamp of approval?” you should take one here. maybe let me know how it goes…

i’m not checking my spelling. i don’t care.

and, really, where the hell have the merrymakers gone? it seems like no one is here to make me happy anymore. and i’m usually so easy to please.. oh wait, it just happened. my boyfriend’s asleep on the couch and he’s talking in his sleep. he just said, “oh no… no jesus.” ha. maybe it was just funny the way he said it. but i’m entertained again. hoorah.



ninja stole my bike!
August 23, 2006, 4:24 am
Filed under: life, opinions

overheard at wal-mart (of all places): “i just can’t wait to get away from all this drama…”

diagnosis: you are retarded

prescription: pull your head out of your fucking ass. there is drama everywhere you go. in fact, it is most likely that you play a large role in creating said drama.

okay, first of all i hate wal-mart and all the people who flock there on a regular basis because they love the “deals.” second, i hate the word drama. anyway, to finish off the prescription for a drama-free life…

role model: me. well, of course, right? okay, i talk a lot of shit, but enjoy a relatively dramaless (somehow dramaless is more pleasing to my palate) existence. i must say relatively because i did recently hear that there is a rumor making it’s rounds that i smashed my friends head into the wall for throwing my cell phone. come on. please. smashed his head into the wall? umm, no, though there may be some truth to the story if you change the whole “smashing head into wall” into something more along the lines of “pushed” and add the phrase “in a drunken rage” at the end or something. i’m not quite sure though. it’s all pretty unclear.

okay, back to it: stop your bitching and quit being such a fucking fat prick and maybe you won’t have sooo much drama. (yeah, i know.. “sooo” is such an ugly word, but i’m positive that’s how the bitch would say it.)



snoring is the first sign of a malignant tumor
August 11, 2006, 11:35 am
Filed under: life, opinions, ramblings

hi, i’m april and i’m a misanthrope.

i would never go to ma. i am proud of my misanthropic attitude. there is little more joy to be had in this world other than that which can be obtained through the unmerited hatred of mankind. unmerited? hardly. some would believe so, but these people are wrong. not only completely in the wrong, but incognitant, or perhaps just unenlightened. there is hope. you too can become a orgulous misanthrope.

let me reiterate, i hate people. let me clarify, i can like or even love people, but these are to be earned, not handed out like backrubs in a cuddle puddle. love, however, does not mean the absolute absence of hatred. that’s the beauty of hatred, it can accompany and enhance any other emotion. i believe i have approximately three to four friends who are loved to the fullest and to whom the term hatred can not be consistently applied.

there are many reasons to hate people. i hate people who do not know how to shut up, when to shut up, or the value of shutting their fucking mouths for one goddamn second. i adore peace and quiet. i could sit in silence and think or not think all day. this, unfortunately, is often interrupted by the constant babble of bullshit flowing from some dumbass’s mouth. let me tell you, i do not, absolutely do not, give a fuck what the hell you ate for breakfast or the consistency of your bowel movement (bbmbf). i also hate people who do not understand how to take a hint, especially a very direct, hardly subtle hint.

we have always been told not to judge a book by it’s cover. go ahead, listen to your grandma. looks aren’t everything. don’t judge by them. this does not mean that you have to give that book or person the benefit of the doubt and automatically like them. no! hate them. you can always begin to like them if they have any qualities deserving, otherwise why waste your time? more importantly, you will never be disappointed if the person isn’t that 1 out of 107 and turns out to be a total douche.